How do I ask others for help as a cancer caregiver?

Many caregivers say that, looking back, they took too much on themselves, or wish they had asked for help sooner. The National Cancer Institute suggests taking an honest look at what you can and can't do: which things do you want to do yourself, and which can you turn over or share with others?

Tasks that others can often help with include:

• chores like cooking, cleaning, shopping, or yard work
• taking care of the kids or picking them up from school or activities
• driving your loved one to appointments or picking up medicines
• being the contact person to keep others updated

Accepting help isn't always easy, but getting help for yourself can also help your loved one—you may stay healthier, and they may feel less guilty about all you're doing. Websites such as SignUpGenius or Lotsa Helping Hands can help you organize requests and tasks.

Be prepared that some people may not be able to help—they may be coping with their own problems, be afraid of cancer, or not realize how hard things are. If someone isn't giving the help you need, you can explain your needs, or simply let it go. If the relationship is important, telling them how you feel can help prevent resentment from building up.